Still on the struggle bus

In case you hadn’t figured out by my month-and-a-half hiatus, I’m still struggling to get back on the losing train. My weight basically remains the same since March—give or take a couple of pounds.

Currently, it’s give (my gut) a few more pounds. Thanks, election-related stress eating.

That’s why I was excited to see the new features WW launched this week as part of its MyWW+ program.

I’m hoping it will be just the kick-start I need to get back into losing mode, especially since I have less than a year left until my big 50th birthday. I’d still like to be a my goal weight by then, though that looks increasingly unlikely when I have 75 pounds to lose and it took me more than a year to lose the first 50.

Right now, I’ll just be happy to be in One-derland by next October 7. That means losing another 50-ish pounds.

Shirt by StitchFix. Giant mug of morning coffee by me, since I’m again working from home this week. Fewer Points than Dunkin’ or Dutch Bros—and dare I say just as tasty.

This pandemic life is driving me crazy. I’ve needed a haircut since April, but I don’t feel like chancing a trip to the salon. I’m still working fewer hours, which leaves more time for crocheting … AND snacking.

One could argue that I also have more time for working out—and one would be correct. But for some reason, I find that tougher to get done.

Excuses, excuses. We all have plenty of those, don’t we?

I also have less money because of the reduced work hours, which leads to more stress about my finances.

WW’s mindset pillar seems to be where I’m struggling the most. I’ll have a couple of good, on-track days and then want to eat ALL. THE. THINGS. And when I eat something I don’t feel I “should” eat, I tend to stop tracking and keep eating … because I’ve already “blown it” for the day. Might as well, because “I’ll never have X food again.”

Logically, I know this isn’t true. Unfortunately, the message doesn’t always make it from my brain to my mouth.

The new meal planning tool in the WW app looks like it will be useful, especially in keeping me from resorting to takeout. My biggest issue is trying to come up with dinner plans on the fly. I end up thinking it’s easier to order something.

I just wish they’d added the menu planner to the app before I invested in the paper 52-week menu planner.

On the struggle bus

I do not like the struggle bus, yet I find myself on an extended ride.

My weight continues to bounce around the 250s, as it has since March.

Our sweet neighbor brought us brownies AND cake over the long holiday weekend, and I’ve been partaking of both. Too much of both. (She bakes desserts for local restaurants … and they’re GOOD. You can taste the real butter and sugar in those brownies.)

I didn’t hit my monthly step goal for August, instead falling 5,389 steps short. My September goal is off to a rocky start as well, because I had an extremely lazy Labor Day weekend. On Sunday, I didn’t even break 2,000 steps.

That means I’m at an average of 4,400 steps/day, but I need 5,800 steps/day on average to hit September’s modest goal.

Ugh.

On the plus side, I managed 8,042 steps on Monday, courtesy of a trip to the grocery store and a long after-dinner walk… so I can turn that around.

One of my WW leaders, Brent, gave me some advice last week when I shared my struggles: Decide how bad you want it. (One plus of the pandemic is that I can go to Zoom webinars several times a week, and I now have more than one great coach to turn to for advice.)

I think Brent may have pinpointed the problem. In addition to being in the middle of a problematic pandemic, I’ve gotten (more than) a little complacent.

I mean, I’m down more than 50 pounds. I sometimes catch a glimpse of myself in a reflective surface and am pleasantly surprised at what I see.

Some days—okay, MOST days—I want the brownie, or an after-dinner run to Dunkin’ with my boyfriend, more than I want to see success on the scale.

And yet … and yet …

That’s not entirely true. I DO want to see the scale move downward. I still have 75-ish pounds to lose before I hit my goal. And I want to hit my goal and make lifetime so I can stop paying WW money. With my COVID-induced hours cut, money is scarce and getting moreso.

That means it’s time for an attitude adjustment. I already said I’d be honestly tracking in September (and then promptly tracked nothing last Friday-Sunday).

Sigh.

I’m back on the honest tracking wagon as of Monday, and we planned out our dinners for the week.

Breakfasts will be either Overnight Oats or an egg & cheese breakfast sandwich … and I’m planning to make Pound Dropper’s Pumpkin Spice French Toast Casserole this weekend. Lunches will most likely involve turkey sandwiches. I love the Boar’s Head Aloha Hawaiian Turkey.

Perhaps this plan will help me exit the struggle bus. I may also go back to #mywwgreenplan … I’ve done all three, and recently switched back to blue because I resent counting eggs on green (and I HATE egg substitute). I’ve been toying with the idea of going back to green though, because it might help me break into the 240s.

Fingers crossed!

Making progress

For all of us, 2020 has been a hell of a year … but I am making progress! In the chaos that has been the time of COVID, that’s all I can hope for. Working from home for the month of April, steps from my fridge and snack cabinet, did me no favors.

I have, however, lost 17.1 pounds since January 2020—and that’s not nothing!

My aim continues to be to lose another 75-ish pounds by the time I turn 50 in October 2021.

I can do this—provided I stop getting attacks of the munchies. Had another one of those this afternoon.

Stress eating is no joke y’all! What I SHOULD do is turn to walking or yoga for stress relief.

Or maybe I ought to stop “should”-ing all over myself. I’ll get to where I want to be with more than a little persistence, patience and consistency.